Every parent loves and wants the best for their child. However, love also needs to be accompanied by the right education method. In real life, there are countless parents who are ready to pamper their children too much, making the child unable to be independent, worse, losing the ability to distinguish right from wrong.
Improper shelter can be a chronic poison that slowly plunges a child into tragedy. The story of actress Dich Oanh’s family is such an unfortunate case.
Son is only 12 years old to be weaned, 15 years old still wants to sleep with his mother
Di Oanh (1962) used to be a famous actress in Taiwan (China), whose works created great resonance. Despite being a star with a relatively successful career, Dich Oanh’s method of educating children has received a lot of criticism to the point of controversy.
It is known that at the age of 33, the actress’s family had their first son after 3 times of artificial insemination. Because of that, her son – Ton An Ta was surrounded by his parents.
From an early age, Ton An Ta was pampered by his parents
Under the pampering of his mother, it was not until the age of 12 that the boy Ton An Ta was weaned. At the age of 15, he still wants to sleep with his mother and has the same habits as when he was a kid. This behavior towards a teenager who is going through puberty like Ton An Ta is considered completely inappropriate, even causing a lot of controversy.
Although many people have criticized Dich Oanh’s way of raising children, the actress still thinks that everything is simply the closeness between mother and child. Later, until her husband complained, she let her son sleep separately when Ton An Ta began to have physiological reactions on the body.
From childhood to adulthood, every action of Ton An Ta was covered by his parents, little by little. He eats delicious food, attends schools with tuition fees of tens of thousands of dollars. Before the age of 15, he was never allowed to go out alone without parental supervision.
Dich Oanh once shared that his son will make a big deal in the future, so he needs to eat a lot of rice every day. Therefore, she is willing to spend 7 hours a day just to monitor Ton An Ta eat all the rice for an adult.
Dich Oanh’s many methods of raising children caused controversy, such as giving her children breast milk until they were 12 years old, letting them sleep together even though they were 15 years old.
The “bitter” ending for overprotecting children
In the eyes of Dich Oanh’s family, his son’s actions were all right. Because of this, Ton An Ta himself also gradually lost the ability to distinguish right from wrong and eventually encountered a bitter ending. Accordingly, because of being pampered by his parents, right from the time he was sitting at school, Ton An Ta had a series of offensive actions such as bullying female classmates, using plastic guns to sneak attacks on others…
At the age of 18, Ton An Ta left his parents for the first time and went to the US to study. Just a short time later, Ton An Ta was arrested for illegal weapons possession and sentenced to 10 years in prison. The American policeman responsible for Ton An Ta’s case shared, during his 54 years of career, he had never met a young man armed with dangerous weapons and having such an anti-social way of thinking.
Worth mentioning here is the attitude of actor and wife Dich Oanh. When they learned that their child was being detained, they resented the classmate who denounced Ton An Ta’s behavior as “a talkative person”. Not only that, they also constantly justify their son’s actions, calling him “an extremely honest child”.
In December 2018, Ton An Ta was released on bail and returned to Taiwan (China). This return, the son of actress Dich Oanh made many people angry when he constantly smirked, showing disdain in front of the media lens.
Ton An Ta’s smirk and calm attitude when he was released on bail made the audience extremely angry
After that, Ton An Ta announced that she wanted to enter the entertainment industry, Dich Oanh and her husband did not hesitate to dedicate themselves to helping their children complete their goals. Dich Oanh’s husband helps his son find a director, while Dich Oanh proudly declares: “One day, Ton An Ta will be even more famous than Jackie Chan.”
However, contrary to the expectations of the actress and her husband, the name Ton An Ta could not pop up in the competitive entertainment industry. On the contrary, when mentioning the name Ton An Ta, people only remember the mistakes Ton An Ta made, not any significant achievements on the career path.
Two years ago, Ton An Ta also caused people to stir when a hot girl “accused” of making her pregnant but was not responsible for the child. As a result, this girl suffered damage to her health and had to have an abortion. At a time when the incident has not been confirmed, actress Dich Oanh still calmly said, “It’s just that my son is too handsome to be noticed.”
Ton An Ta made a series of unforgivable mistakes
Returning to Ton An Ta’s story, most people vehemently opposed the odd parenting style of Dich Oanh’s family and thought that it was this that led Ton An Ta astray. The case of Ton An Ta is a wake-up call to parents about how overprotecting their children can harm their children.
If parents indulge their children blindly, parents not only deprive their children of the opportunity to grow up, but also create selfish children who only know how to enjoy life. The easier it is for parents to raise, the easier it is for children to make mistakes, and gradually there is no way to recover.
So how to know if parents are indulging their children blindly?
Behavioral therapist Jessica Leichtweisz shared, if you want to know if children are being overprotected by their parents, look at how they behave in the following situations:
When your child takes care of himself:
In many families, parents still have the concept that “when children are young, they know what to do”, so they do not let the child do anything. This will make them lazy, don’t know the value of work and find it difficult to be independent after adulthood.
With simple self-care tasks such as changing clothes, bathing, cleaning the classroom… try to stop helping your child for a day. Seeing if they can cope without adult help is to know if your child is being over-indulged.
When your child receives a gift:
Learning to be grateful is an early lesson that families should teach their children at a young age. Usually, when receiving a gift, the child will be happy, expressing gratitude to the gift giver. However, in cases where the child is unhappy, even disparaging the gift, it could be a sign of overindulgence.
“Pampered kids tend to get angry when they don’t get what they want,” marriage and family therapist Nicole Arzt once told me.
– When your child is asked to help others:
Over-indulged children rarely have empathy for others. Instead, they only know how to ask for people and do not care about the circumstances and difficulties they face. That is also the reason why many children tend to refuse, even “prank” others when they ask for help. If this mentality is not corrected by parents at an early age, later on, children tend to become unruly, self-centered and gradually lose the ability to regulate emotions.
Source: Sohu